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Totes Amazeballs

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I honestly believe I have taken leave of my senses.  It has been 27 years since I last left my house carrying a "cheap" handbag, I blame it on the first Gucci I ever owned, a sweet little black monogrammed number that drew so many comments I was soon hooked on high end arm candy.

Louis Vuitton, Prada, Fendi etc etc followed over the years and such is my obsession that I actually get quite annoyed with myself when I fall in love with a high street number because I often want them, but know I won't use them, yes I am a crazy cat.

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Last week I had a client who walked in with the most adorable tote.  I loved the nude/blush colour, the size (I am a huge fan of massive totes) and the shape which reminded me of Celine.  I couldn't help but enquire as to where she had made this purchase and it was no surprise to find that it was from Spanish Fashion Supremo's, Zara.

The day went on and I couldn't stop thinking about her damn handbag and come evening I was straight on the Zara website trawling the last knockings of their sale, which was pretty abysmal by anybody's standards, but they did have the said bag, although only in black.  I toyed with the idea of the black one although with a Givenchy tote, of similar mammoth proportions, I didn't really want or need black and worried that it would look cheap.  A short while later I added it to basket and checked out, convincing myself that I could easily return it or use instead of a storage basket in my ensuite or something equally ridiculous! Maybe plant something in it, I don't know.

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I text my client to tell her of my obsession and subsequent order and got a reply saying that I was such a snob! Now if you don't know me, here is where you have to trust me, because I am so far removed from being a snob it's a joke! Then I thought about my feelings for bags from the High Street and thought maybe she did have a point and if I were snobbish in any way, shape or form, it was to do with bags.

Cheap shoes, yes I can do them, and easily.  Of course I prefer designer "Rhythm and Blues" but if I see a pair I love on the High Street I don't think twice about purchasing. Bags, not so much. I bought one from Reiss about three years ago which is still sitting in my wardrobe and the Zara number made famous by Olivia Palermo? I sold mine to a friend.

So the email arrived saying my Zara parcel was ready for collection instore and as I walked to the desk to pick up, there she was in all her nudey, blush coloured glory, the last bag left in the colour I really wanted!  I scooped her up quicker than a magpie could nick your wedding ring from the kitchen window sill, made my way to the till, and told the Sales Assistant I had come to pick up a package containing a black one of these but didn't want it, I wanted THIS one!  She completed the return there and then, black was so going back and nude was coming home with me!

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The day finally dawned when I planned to take her out, on a trip into town last Friday.  I twitched with nerves when I entered Thomas Cook to a chorus of "I love your bag, who's that by?".  I toyed with the idea of lying but was scared a) my tongue would go black or b) I would end up with a Pinocchio  nose like June Whitfield in the Birds Eye Chicken Pie adverts from way back in the 70's, so with great embarrassment parading itself as gay abandon, I fessed up and told the TRUTH - wow that is really is Totes Amazeballs!

Gucci UK


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